Who pissed in your cornflakes this morning?

Well, alright, it wasn't in my cornflakes, because I don't eat cornflakes or cereal at all right now, but it is not my idea of a good start to the day to wake up to the sound of someone pissing in the bathroom with the door open when the bathroom is RIGHT NEXT to my bedroom. And because I had been to the bathroom approximately 90 minutes earlier and had noticed that whoever had gone before me had not flushed, I knew that there was a man in the house because The Cuz never does that. Therefore, I extrapolated that there was a stranger pissing in my bathroom with the door open and that, yet again, he was not going to flush the toilet. Needless to say, this did not put me in a good mood at 5:45 am. So, not caring how bitchy I sounded, I got up, went into the kitchen, and said, "Whoever's in there, you better flush that toilet and for the love of God, please close the fucking door next time, would ya?!"

And then I proceeded to make coffee as a tall, muscular black man (very attractive, I must say) scuttled down the hall behind me through our galley kitchen to the Cuz's room with nothing but a little towel wrapped around him, looking suitably remonstrated. I have to admit that I did get a perverse sense of pleasure that he was embarrassed. I do wonder when he came over, though, because when I went to bed at 11:30 pm, he certainly wasn't there.

Now, maybe it's just me, maybe I'm just getting too old for this shit, but waking up with some strange man in the house just isn't on for me anymore. At least not when he wasn't with ME, goddammit!