Saturday, July 29, 2006

And my Indian name is . . .

BUBBLICIOUS. Or at least that's what the movers down the street called me yesterday morning. I can only assume this is a good thing, judging from the amount of staring at my ass that was going on and the calls of Hey, Baby.

I dyed my hair black again. Not really a big shock to anyone, I'm sure. But this time, strangely, people in the neighborhood have started addressing me in Spanish before English. Huh? I must have gotten a tan or something and can't see it myself.

I am exhausted after 12+ hours of go go go, almost all on my feet moving and doing. And I have to do it all over again tomorrow. At least my weekday job won't involve "special" customers or lugging huge buckets of ice (although my arms should soon be looking hella good).

Please remind me to tell you all about "special" customers at a later date. It deserves its own post. Or maybe just a post about what waiters actually do and how to adequately compensate them for their services and how to behave in a restaurant.

Yeah, that's it. Too tired for much else right now and feet are protesting. Not sure what they're protesting or why they would care about my typing, but I really think I should try to appease them. Maybe with some wine. Feet like wine, right?

Wednesday, July 26, 2006


And just like that, everything is gonna be alright.

Well, maybe not just that fast. It's been 2 months of hell, and a lot of stress and panic and worry and fear. Two months of working feverishly to make things be alright.

So here's the story. That wonderful job that I had turned very, very sour. So sour that I was getting sick almost every morning before work, not getting any sleep, falling back into anxiety and panic and booze. So I quit. I had to, it was killing me.

Unfortunately, when I quit, I had no savings in the bank, and lots of bills and rent due. I didn't worry too much at the beginning because I figured I could just fall back on temping again like I always have in the past. Only this time, it wasn't so easy. I must have gone to over a dozen agencies, spent the time and money and effort to play their silly games and take their silly tests (typing at almost 90 wpm still, not too shabby). Then they'd blow sunshine up my ass about all the job orders they had on their books and how I'd be perfect for a few of them. And then I'd never hear from them, no matter how many times I called them.

Meanwhile, my cash was running severely low and I had no prospect of getting any more. So I got desperate and started looking around for other ways of getting some money. First, I rented out my spare room to a medical health care worker here on a 3 month contract. Second, I broke down and went back to waiting tables at a small inn for breakfast and brunches on the weekends. This involves me getting up at the butt crack of dawn . . . well, actually before dawn, every Saturday and Sunday. I basically work straight through from 7 am to 3 or 4 pm both days, with barely any time for a break.

You know, getting back into restaurant work has reminded me of a lot of things. How fun it can be, how fun and nice the people who work in the industry are. How nice it is to have ready cash to show for your hard work.

But, oh, how many things I forgot. The sore back, sore legs, aching feet. One other thing I don't remember and it must be a function of age: swollen ankles that look like they belong on a 9 months pregnant woman. Very nice, not.

So finally, after all of this, last week I was offered one short-term contract making a ridiculous amount of money. Simultaneously, I was informed that another, long-term contract was down to me and one other person. And since then, until yesterday, I've been living in limbo. And yesterday, I found out that I got the long contract, still for more money than I've ever made. That news came none too soon, as the short contract was due to start today.

And so, here I sit, enjoying my last few days of freedom before I begin working 7 days a week for the foreseeable future. But you know, I honestly am not going to complain about working all of the time. I know now how lucky I am to be working at all. Financially, I refuse to ever get into this situation again. It really scared me, because I have pretty much nobody in my life who would be able to help me. It's terrifying.

Okay, so I'm going to call my own bullshit. Of course I'm going to complain about working every damn day. But when I do, please know that I do appreciate the opportunity to work at all. It really means a lot more to me than I thought it did.

BTW, I also found out that I can feed myself and the cats on $10 a week. Who knew?

Monday, July 17, 2006

Just be

I just wanted to thank everyone who has sent me supportive comments, e-mails, etc. I know that things will be okay in the end, but it's just this in between time that is so hard. It eats at me, trying to destroy my soul, and in some small measure it succeeds, but it also fails, because the soul regenerates and those destroyed parts turn into something else, something stronger and less fragile.

One day soon when things have finally turned the corner I will be able to tell the full story. One day when it's over and a new life has begun.

Until then, be good. And if you can't be good, be very, very bad.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

Hit and Run

Well, sorry I haven't been around much lately, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out my pattern: when I'm silent, things ain't going so well. And when things ain't going so well, I find it hard to think about anything else, and it's really just no fun to talk about the down times. Hopefully things will start looking up soon and I'll be back to posting fun, inane, and occasionally thoughtful things for your enjoyment.

The only good thing is I've lost 13 lbs. through stress and budget enforced dieting. It costs more to feed my cats than it does to feed me.

PS - if you know of anyone looking for a furnished room in DC for $550 a month including utilities, please point them in my direction.

Ciao, kids. Be good while I'm gone. I'll try to check in once in a while so don't think you can get away with any nonsense!